Confusing categories auto entrepreneur?

I registered on 2 feb 09 for auto entrepreneur as an agent commerciale, to basically source houses and find buyers for the properties, no TVA involved. I received my siret, so far so good. I get a call from my local tax office saying I must stop work as my activity attracts vat, not true. But I contact the CPE and have my activity title changed. OK that was fine until the tax office call me again and say this is still not possible.

1. What do I do?  they will not accept that my job is not vat registered and that I just want to source houses and find buyers!  Other agents are on the same scheme - auto entrepreneur. What category would this be?
2. I have not worked and not claimed benefit, since sept 08, I had a gite business ‘micro bic’which has now ceased trading, since sept 08.  Would I be entitled to ACCRE for the reduction in cotisations?
3. When I complete the quarterly declaration de chiffre d’affaires, which category would I complete a) Ventes de marchandises, b) Prestation de servis commerciales ou artisanale, c) Autres prestation de service
4. My husband is and electrician and also wants to become an agent commerciale and be a cojoint collaborateur under my siret, is this possible?